Such a calm, mellow, somewhat normal person right? Sure, until the sun goes down. Yes. James is a very entertaining person once he's gone to sleep! James is the type who loves to go to bed by 9:30pm and wake up at 5:30am. So, every Tuesday night, when I get home, I get to snuggle close to an already sleeping husband, in an already warmed up bed. And this is when the show begins.
(Clarification.... If you are wondering why he's asleep every Tuesday night when I get home, it's because I go over to Niccole's house after mutual, and watch American Idol with her. We don't get it started until after 9:00pm, so I don't get home until after 10:00pm. It's kind of my little break every week. Some...me-time....if you will. No kids, no responsibilities. Just some relaxing, entertaining television with another female who enjoys American Idol as much as I do. Plus- my husband and kids are asleep anyway, so what is it that I'm really missing at home?)
Okay, back to James. First of all, James falls asleep in about point 2 seconds. Really, he could set records. It doesn't matter what's going on, or what we're talking about, if he's tired, he will be asleep within 10 seconds after his head hits the pillow. Sure he's fell asleep a few times when I was saying our prayer together, that's probably normal once in awhile. But, the best was the time HE was saying our prayer together. He was praying out loud, and there wasn't even really a pause in his sentance before....SILENCE. I kind of thought he just lost track of what he was trying to say, but when he never started again, I nudged him and he quickly ended with an "AMEN!" That was wierd.
So...besides falling asleep incredibly fast, James also has other issues at night. We won't get into all of them, but what is most entertaining, is when he talks. And talks. And talks some more. I notice it mostly right as I crawl into bed after he's been asleep. When I can tell he's in a talking mood, I sometimes ask him random questions to get him going, and then laugh to myself at his stupid answers. Many times he talks about pharmacy terms, which I don't understand, or he says things like, "Carson, give that back to McKenzie." But sometimes....the things he says really catch me off guard. Here are a few of my favorite things he's said to me, in his sleep...
***A few weeks ago I came home and gave him a kiss goodnight, and he yells, "It's so HOT!" and throws off the covers. Then he yells, "Too much....too much...." and I say, too much what? "Too much ....HEAT" Then he proceeds to wipe off my kiss (in a very dramatic way), and yells,"And ...too much spit!" Sorry hon. I apologize for being so slobbery.
*** Last night I crawled in beside him and he starts rapping, "It's as cold as lightening, (mumble, mumble, mumble,)" I then ask him if lightening is cold and he replies...still rapping, " I really like your face, (mumble, mumble, mumble)" I started laughing and gave him a kiss and this is when he says, (in a completely serious tone,) "I'd really appreciate it if you would stop interfering with my daily life." Um...okay. G'night babe.
***One time he was fighting with someone in his dream and I heard him yell, "I''m gonna YANK on your YONKER!" I have no idea what a yonker is, but I'm guessing he was yelling at another man.
*** Another time he tried to Karate Chop me with his hand, while yelling, "hi-yaw!" I had to actually use a little force to push him back over to his side of the bed!
***One time he stuck his tongue out at me and called me a loser. This one wasn't so funny at the time, since I didn't realize he was asleep. I ended up getting my feelings hurt, and when he woke up he was thoroughly confused as to why I was sleeping on the couch. Apparently, he didn't remember any of our conversation or the sticking out of the tongue.
I try to ask him in the morning if he remembers what he was dreaming about, but he never does. It is quite entertaining though.
Point of this blog: If you are ever bored, and you want some cheap entertainment, just come over to my apartment around 10:30pm and listen to my husband ramble. It really is a lot of fun.
14 comments:
Oh Cami, I feel you. Joe is exactly and I mean exactly the same way. He to has fallen asleep while saying prayers. I'm just like you, I try to have a conversation with him and it is hilarious, but one time he did actually punch me in the face.
I have always told him, I envy him so much for how fast he can fall asleep. I think it's because guys have nothing to worry about and they don't have a million things to think about what they have to do the next day.
So funny!!!!!
So funny! I wish Cameron was that funny while he slept. He is boring and just sleeps. Maybe you should tape him and show him what he does. I bet he will think its funny too
This makes me miss you so bad! I would pay money to witness James rapping in his sleep. Ya know. Since James and thug go hand in hand. HAHA!
Oh cami! that is so funny, Does he know you wrote this about him? Is he going to be upset that you shared?
Rob talks in his sleep too it is really funny to watch the facial expresions of a sleeping man!
Oh that is hilarious!!
Oh my goodness, that is hilarious! Why is it that men can fall asleep so fast? It takes me at least an hour every night after I hit the pillow, and I just plan on it. I hate it, but that's when my mind just starts reeling and I never fall right asleep. However, Adam is out like a light within seconds of hitting his pillow also! Those men...that's too funny. You should record some of James' "moments" - that would be funny!
That is SO funny!!! Please move to back so I can come over and see this. Jake fell asleep one time while he was praying outloud with me too.
HAHA!! That made me laugh!
I am sitting here laughing out loud. I'm sure James' is appreciative of your sharing his "Bedroom habits".
Too funny. Dad tried to climb out of the bedroom window once in his sleep yelling "Fire, fire".
But you know how entertaining dad can be in his sleep.
That was hysterical. I hope he thinks so. haha.
What a funny post. I can totally imagine James doing all that. My favorite was the "I'd really appreciate it if you would stop interferring...". Hilarious! I love to hear people talk in their sleep.
By the way - I was just thinking - soon you'll have to change your blogger name to funfamilyoffive - exciting! How are you feeling?
I just have one piece of advice that you may want to take very seriously. DO NOT (and I repeat) DO NOT ask him in his sleep who his girl friend is. Ann asked me one time and I apparently answered "Alice." Very fortunately for me we did not know anyone named Alice. (Whew!!!!!)
Ha!Ha! You guys crack me up! It must be a man thing. Anton talks in his sleep a lot too. It's pretty hilarious! Once he even screamed cause he thought there were monsters in the room, I guess maybe that can't be called a "man" thing. I know you are just down the street and around the corner, but we miss you guys! Good times.
I think you must have misheard the yonker thing
Oh that is hilarious! He's a good sport to let us get a good laugh at his expense :)
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